Red Tide Rising

The Red Raiders and Longhorns finally supplied a legitimate game between this year's alleged top football teams. Previous attempts by Ohio State-USC, Florida-Georgia, etc. resulted in one-sided affairs.

It's a shame that by winning on a last-second touchdown, Texas Tech probably hindered the chances of an entertaining national championship.

Expect Alabama (who beat up on non-conference foe Arkansas State) and Penn State (idle) to ascend to the top spots in the BCS standings. Alabama has a rugged SEC schedule left, as well as a potential SEC title game. Meanwhile, Penn State has Iowa, Indiana and Michigan State. Only the Spartans have a winning record in the mediocre Big Ten.

Can't wait for the BCS Blowout Part III where the Big Ten representative gets taken behind the woodshed by a team from below the Mason-Dixon Line. Sweet.

Getting Their Phill

The Phillies are champions of baseball ... wow ... did not expect to say that on Opening Day 2008.

Some fun things to think about in brief.

• Point of criticism that will be debated tomorrow: Joe Maddon elects to let J.P. Howell hit and keeps him in to face Pat Burrell, fearing a left-hander throwing sliders to the right-handed slugger will end badly. Well, letting the righty Howell go didn't help much. Burrell doubled, leading to the game-winning run.

Was it the wrong move? No way to tell. But if it were me, I'd want the ball in the hand of the guy with the best stuff. David Price is that guy.

• If you're one of the people lauding Francisco Rodriguez for the American League MVP, you better be voting for Brad Lidge on the NL ballot.

Lidge: 92 Ks, a 1.95 ERA and 41 saves in 41 opportunities. If it weren't for Lidge, the Phillies would not have even been in the playoffs, topping the Mets by just 3 games. The Angels cruised in on a 21 game cushion. And I know the postseason doesn't count, but come on.

• 25-year-old Cole Hamels received the World Series MVP trophy, but made his first mistake of the postseason — revealing his wife's age (30?!?!) on national television. Just give her the car keys to that newly-won Camaro, Cole, and you might make even it back into the house tonight.

• Why do network anchors get to serve as emcees for the postseason celebration? They're usually painfully awkward and tonight was no exception.

• Interesting choice of words by Phils' manager Charlie Manuel during the post game interview: "I thought we could beat anyone in our league." Unsaid by Charlie Manuel: "But since I'm sane, at no time did I ever think we could beat someone from the American League."

Remember Me?

I wish I could say that there was some sort of thematic basis for my hiatus from this blog — say, solidarity with Major League Baseball's tough, but correct, call to suspend Game 5 of the World Series — but alas, it's just a lot of work getting in the way.

Rather than try to catch you up on all of the news I missed, let's start fresh, eh?

The World Series actually does resume tonight (we think) after a 46-hour mid-inning intermission. The debate is already raging as to whether or not Bud Selig and Co. made the right decision.

It's not clear cut. There's no way that the World Series should be decided with an abbreviated game. However, the rule on the book states that games count after five-and-a-half innings. The conditions seemed to deteriorate into the "unplayable" category between that time and when the Rays tied the score in the top of the sixth inning, leading Philly fans — and strict interpreters of the Constitution — to believe Major League Baseball was continuing play so as not to give the Phillies a rain-shortened win.

Two things strike me about this scenario. 1.) This has never happened before? Really? What are the odds of that. 2.) MLB has screwed up a lot of things (see: Steroids, tied All-Star Games, Astro Turf, over expansion ... ) but this was not one of them. The title of your sport should be decided on a field by players and not by Doppler 8000 radar.

***

In the NHL, the Washington Caps stumbled a bit over their Western Conference swing, losing at Calgary and Phoenix before picking up an OT win against Dallas. Washington returned home and snagged a shootout win against Nashville last night, despite the absence of Alex Ovechkin. Ovechkin, who has struggled to start the season, with only 2 G, returned home to Moscow to be with his ailing grandfather.

Alexander Semin stepped in just fine, dealing with Nashville's top defensive line and pairing to notch a goal and an assist and potting a goal in the shootout. Semin is on fire, probably because he's playing with some desire this season. Last year's run to the playoffs certainly seemed to ignite Semin's drive, leading the Russian sniper to skate hard after loose pucks and play the body in the series against the Flyers. Prior to last season Semin sometimes sleepwalked through games. Not this year. And if opponents choose to snooze on him, they're going to get burned.

The play of goalie Jose Theodore has caused some concern, but, as I discuss in tomorrow's FCNP Splinters, I'm not too worried ... yet. It's early and there are a lot of top tier goalies struggling right now ... including the much-adored Cristobal Huet, who manned the crease for the Caps' miracle run last year.

A bigger problem has been some spotty play by the Caps defense. Washington's back-enders have been missing a few checks at their own blue line and, worse, have been slow to pick up open attackers trolling the front of the net. The eventual return of Tom Poti will help a lot, but I'm still waiting for them to call up Karl Alzner.

The Caps are scraping the salary cap limit, which is what kept Alzner in the AHL out of training camp, but from what I've seen, his play has been vastly superior to what Tyler Sloan has shown so far (and that's no knock on Sloan or his great story of determination). I even think Alzner was better than John Erskine, though shockingly the Caps extended him for two more years lately. My quick analysis based on the signing? Alzner will be in Washington for sure next season. Shaone Morrisonn, whom will likely be due another raise after winning his arbitration case this summer, will not. Again, that's based on nothing, but losing Morrisonn would be a disappointing cap casualty.

Isiah's Wild Ride, Catching Up With the Series

The far-fetched life of Isiah Thomas added another chapter yesterday when an ambulance left his home and rushed what police said to be a 47-year-old man to the hospital after he overdosed on sleeping pills. Thomas, who happens to be 47, said it was not him, but rather his high school-aged daughter. The police say he's lying.

While all the circumstantial signs point to Isiah actually being the one who ODed, one thing is for certain, blaming whatever happened on his daughter is absurd. Even if it was his daughter, you tell reporters to bug off and that it's a private matter and ask them to respect that during a difficult time. But Isiah couldn't do that, he had to make sure people didn't think less of him. Way to throw your family under the bus Isiah. Hopefully there will be better days ahead for the Thomas family.

***

The World Series is knotted at one game apiece after terrific pitching performances by the Phillies' Cole Hamels and the Rays' James Shields in Games 1 and 2.

The story so far has been the Phillies' inability to drive in runners in scoring position, as discussed by ESPN's Jerry Crasnick here. Heading home to the band box that is Citizens Bank Park will help, but wherever he's playing these days, Ryan Howard looks lost at the plate. He's batting .250 with no home runs and 11 Ks in 40 at bats in the postseason.

If the Phillies can snag another win tonight or in Game 4, I think they've got a good shot to win it, because I don't think the Rays are beating Hamels in Game 5. And if it comes down to Game 7, you can bet you'll see the lefty out of the bullpen at the very least, giving him an opportunity to piece together one of the greatest postseason pitching performances of all time.

In four starts this postseason, batters are hitting just .182 against him, while Hamels has posted 27 strikeouts (to just eight walks) and a 1.55 ERA. That said, he's a young guy, will he run out of gas? It will be fun to watch for sure.

Sox Still Kickin' and Other Notes

Not a ton of time today, but here are some headlines to keep you interested:

The Red Sox aren't dead yet, rallying from a 7-0 deficit to stave off elimination and beat the Rays at Fenway Park last night. Hmm ... where have we seen this before?

You can't feel good about this if you're a Tampa fan. Not only did you choke up a 7-run lead, but the Sox clearly have the mojo now and confidence must be at a premium in the bullpen, after the top three arms in it — Grant Balfour, Dan Wheeler and J.P. Howell — all gave up runs last night.

The Washington Capitals won their third straight game, rallying in similarly astounding fashion — down 3-0 — to beat the Penguins, 4-3, in Pittsburgh. The Crosby-Ovechkin rivalry turned one notch hotter as the two apparently exchanged words in the hallways of Mellon Arena after the game.

The best sign for the Caps this young season? Ovechkin only has two goals and the team has scored nine total in its last two wins. If you're notching four goals a night and your MVP isn't even on track yet, you've got bright skies ahead.

One person who is clicking is Brad Boyes. I'll now take a second to answer that resounding "WHO?" I just heard you utter at your monitors. Boyes, a center with the St. Louis Blues, already has four goals this season, after lighting the lamp 43 times last year. The most remarkable thing about last year's feat? His shooting percentage topped 20-percent. One out of every five times he put the puck on net it went in. Sniper!

Blackhawks Coach Denis Savard will have some time on his hands, seeing as how he is no longer Blackhawks Coach. Savard was canned after a 1-2-1 start four games into the season. Ouch.

Joba Chamberlain is likely to start again for the Yankees in 2009.

The Padres are lining up suitors for a potential Jake Peavy trade.

Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo tries to impress everyone and play with a broken pinkie finger.

Splinters Magic Mail Bag and Press Pass with Broken Social Scene's Brendan Canning

The FCNP version of Splinters is up. This week I delve into my monthly Magic Mailbag to answer some questions of uh, avid, readers. It's so weird how this Joe G. guy keeps asking me about the Redskins...weird. I also explore the College Football scene as teams try to stay at the top once they reach No. 1. Easier said than done.

For Press Pass I sit down with Broken Social Scene's Brendan Canning to discuss the nuances of working with an ever-changing lineup that often consists of eight members or more on stage at the same time. And also when he likes to take his mid-set bathroom breaks.

Manny Becoming Manny

Sorry I have posted absolutely nothing this week, but I've been busy working on something.

Remember a little while back when I posted I was planning on writing a piece on the evolution of Manny Ramirez? It went live today, published by ESPN The Magazine's Web site, espnthemag.com.

The piece looks back at the phrase "Manny Being Manny" and the particular behaviors Ramirez flaunted on each occasion based on a Lexis Nexis search for the team. First guy to quip Manny Being Manny? Wouldn't you like to know ... You can find out here: A Brief History of the Phrase "Manny Being Manny"

Also be sure to check out fellow Hoya Ted Bauer's work catching up with Dennis Eckersley and Kirk Gibson 20 years after Jack Buck couldn't believe what he just saw.

NHL Notes

Most of the NHL has begun its 2008-09 schedule. Here's a quick look at early storylines around the league:

• There were questions whether or not relatively inexperienced goaltender Dan Ellis could carry the Nashville Predators. Friday's 5-2 loss to St. Louis was not a good start.

• The Columbus Blue Jackets beat the Dallas Stars for just the second time in the last 19 meetings on Friday, with an OT goal by Rick Nash.

• The Rangers are off to a 3-0 start after besting the Blackhawks Friday.

• The Caps look to rebound from their loss in Atlanta when they open the season against the Blackhawks, pitting young stars Alex Ovechkin and Nicklas Backstrom against Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane. Oh yeah, and it marks the return of goalie Cristobal Huet, whose departure to Chicago via free agency forced the Caps to sign Jose Theodore instead. ESPN's Scott Burnside previews the contest here.

Caps Thrashed In Opener

As I wrote in my FCNP article previewing the Capitals, the key to success for this year's team lies squarely on their defensive play and the ability of goaltending import Jose Theodore. That Theodore allowed 4 goals on 17 shots in Friday's 7-4 loss to the Atlanta Thrashers, a team picked to finish last in the Southeast Division, is not a good omen.

The first goal, scored on the power play by Atlanta's Ron Hainsey, was the fault of the penalty kill unit, who had their backs turned and didn't pick him up crashing the low slot. The second goal (off a uncontrolled rebound), and the third and fourth (off ordinary wrist shots that should have been easy saves) were squarely on Theodore.

It's safe to say he had a bad night. But if this is the start of a trend, the Caps have serious problems. Brent Johnson was a capable backup last year and looked good before the team's meltdown late in the third Friday, but can he carry the load all year long?

It's one game. There's a good possibility this is just a blip on the radar due to first-game jitters and the pressure that every publication has said the Caps' Stanley Cup hopes ride on his shoulders. But what are the Caps options if it isn't?

The Caps can either go with Johnson, call up 20-year-old prospect Simeon Varlamov or trade someone (perhaps Michael Nylander) for another NHL caliber netminder. I don't think any of those scenarios involve hoisting the Cup this spring.

Other points of interest:

• Mike Green scored his first two goals of the season after leading all defensemen with 18 last year. Green only had three goals through Nov. 21 last year and still put up that mark. During training camp, Head Coach Bruce Boudreau said he believed Green hadn't even touched upon how good he can be. There is a very real possibility that he could score 30 goals this season.

• Boudreau's long-time friend, John Anderson, picked up the win behind the bench in Atlanta, his first as an NHL coach. Boudreau's success has paved the way for a number of AHL coaches to get a shot at the big leagues. Anderson and Scott Gordon (Islanders) emerged from the minor league to head up teams, with a number more rising to assistant positions in the NHL.

• The refs Friday night were a little over ambitious, whistling 14 penalties before a rash of fights at the end. In fact, none of the four goals in the second period were scored at even strength.

One thing this did was showcase two new members of the Caps penalty killing units — Alex Ovechkin and Alexander Semin. Semin looked brilliant in the role, setting up a shorthanded goal by Dave Steckel and, on another shift, drawing a penalty to negate the Atlanta advantage.

The theory, inspired by Team Russia's use of Semin on the penalty kill during this summer's World Championships, is to give the PK units a quick threat at the top of the box capable of breaking up passes at the point and occasionally picking them off for a shorthanded scoring opportunity. The drawback is the absurd amount of ice time Ovechkin now accounts for.

Friday he was on the ice for 23:02 (2:55 on the penalty kill), bettered only by Mike Green and Atlanta's Ron Hainsey, both defenseman. Boudreau said he was looking for ways to get Ovie more ice time. But can he sustain an entire season of this? Probably. He averaged 23:07 on the ice last year and the only side effects he showed came in the form of league-leading goals and points totals.

• Thrashers first-round draft pick Zach Bagosian's "welcome to the NHL" moment? Squaring off with Caps enforcer Donald Brashear late in the third period. One uppercut. Two uppercut. Down goes the 18-year-old rookie.

I'm not sure why Brash squared off against the baby-faced kid, but it's an event that will likely set a harsh tone for this season series.

FCNP Posts

Three articles in this week's Falls Church News-Press — the FCNP Splinters, Press Pass and a preview article on the Washington Capitals after I spent a few days in their training camp two weeks back.

The hype surrounding the Caps is focused primarily on uber-wing Alex Ovechkin, and rightly so. There have been few years like the one he had last year. But the beauty of the Capitals' upcoming season is that the scoring won't depend solely on No. 8. Each of the Caps' top three lines feature a past 30-goal scorer. With Chris Clark and Michael Nylander skating with prospect Tomas Fleischmann on Washington's third line, generating goals will not be a problem for the Caps. What will be? Read the article and find out.

Splinters focuses on the surprising Redskins and exactly how they've been able to be so good this year.

Press Pass will be a hit for prime time TV fans, as I interview Val Emmich, better known as Jesse, the new love interest on ABC's "Ugly Betty." If you think the guy sounds great as a musician, it's probably because he is one. Has been since high school actually. Inside we chat about his music, his acting and exactly why he was skeptical to sign on to play the current role alongside Betty. Hint: It's not because she's "ugly."

Amid Downturn, Turnstiles Unaffected?

Not a lot of big news today, which makes tonight a great time to check out a little long-form journalism. Remember that? We bloggers tend to shun it — probably because large numbers of readers also shun it — but it doesn't make the feature-length articles any less worthwhile or intriguing.

So grab an energy drink if you have to, but take a look at SI.com's interesting inspection of the economic downturn and its affect on pro sports teams. It may not be having the effect you think it might.

I'm also trying to find footage from last night's "E:60," ESPN's version of "60 Minutes." For some reason, it's the only segment not posted online. In it, NHL pest and Stars forward Sean Avery expresses his enthusiasm for women's hand bags and fashion. Not exactly the sentiments you'd expect from a hockey player who doesn't hesitate to mix it up on the ice. Is Sean Avery hockey's Dennis Rodman? Does this mean the Prada lover will ask for a trade to the Devils?

This isn't totally an out of the blue development. In April it was announced that Avery would be working as an intern at Vogue. During New York's Fashion Week he watched a runway show sitting between Martha Stewart and Winona Ryder. And for anyone thinking he might be a little light in the skates, you should cut that talk right now, seeing as how he dated Elisha Cuthbert.

How Much Did You Pay for that Haircut?

$14 if you're Alex Ovechkin getting it styled at the Hair Cuttery at the Ballston Commons Mall.

The web site for Ovechkin's latest endorsement deal went live recently, meaning you too can see how the best hockey player in the world gets his hair styled ... and even download wallpaper ... at oviestyle.com.

The site is a little weird. On one slide it features his musings on his hair cut philosophy, while also discussing how he watches other teams from the penalty box. What, you don't see the connection?

For those unfamiliar with the story, the link between the Russian-born star of the Washington Capitals and Hair Cuttery dates back to Ovechkin's monster contract. After slapping his John Hancock on that 13-year $124 million deal, Ovie was asked what he'd do with all the money. Caps owner Ted Leonsis jumped in, recommending the scruffy Ovechkin get a hair cut.

The next day, Ovie did. For $14, just like he usually does, at the Hair Cuttery in the Ballston Mall that houses the Caps' practice facilities. The ad wizards took care of the rest.

Suicide? Check. Squeeze? Not So Much.

The Red Sox eliminated the Angels last night, thanks in large part to the Angels.

After a leadoff double and a sacrifice bunt, the Angles had a runner on third with just one out with the score tied at two in the top of the ninth. All Erick Aybar (pictured) had to do was hit a mildly-deep fly ball to the outfield ... or of any depth to Jacoby Ellsbury ... and speedster Reggie Willits would have scored easily. So what do the Angels do? They put on the squeeze play.

Aybar misses the inside pitch by Sox reliever Manny Delcarmen entirely and Willits is caught halfway down the third base line and tagged out. In the bottom of the inning, Willits goes for the gusto, diving for a looping Jason Bay fly ball that kicks into the stands for a ground rule double and Jed Lowrie drives him home with a two-out single for the win.

This game was lost for one fundamental reason: Aybar flat out didn't do his job at the plate. When the squeeze play is on, you have to make contact. In fact, I find it close to unfathomable that a major league middle infielder can't make contact with a fastball while attempting a bunt. Contact on a hit and run, that's one thing. But you have the bat in front of you and all you have to do is touch the ball. That's it. There are corpses that can bunt. Ted Williams could do it too, even if you didn't thaw him out first. But Aybar? Not so much.

Enjoy the offseason Angels. No curse to blame here. Just bad fundamental baseball.

NFL Roundup and Ozzie Consoles the Cubs

How good are the New York Giants? The recent result (a 44-6 win over early NFC West title pick Seattle, without All-Pro WR Plaxico Burress) would indicate that they are hands down the best team in the league. Along with the Titans, the Giants are the only remaining undefeated team, but before fans of the G-men get too excited, consider also that they escaped against a sad Cincinnati team and nearly let the Redskins come back on them in Week One.

Against the Skins, the Giants left a ton of points on the board in the first half. By settling for field goals, New York nearly let Washington snatch a victory in the fourth quarter ... that is if the Washington 2 minute drill didn't look like QB Jason Campbell was trying to interpret instructions for molecular experiments in Latin.

Champions convert those opportunities. The Giants did that on Sunday against Seattle. If they keep doing it, they'll easily make the playoffs.

They can't sleep on the 1-3 Browns though, next week's opponent. Cleveland QB Derek Anderson will come out hungry, trying to keep his job safe from Brady Quinn. It's definitely a potential trap game for the Boys in Blue.

How good are the Redskins? I don't think anyone thought they'd be this good. Wins over Dallas and Philadelphia in back to back weeks? Who saw that coming? Campbell continues to develop, but RB Clinton Portis carried the day yesterday. CP is second in the NFL in rushing (514 yards) and put up 145 yards against the Eagles.

Best way to keep the ball away from the NFC East's array of All-Pro QBs? Run the football and control the clock. With new coach Jim Zorn's ball-control West Coast offense, they're doing exactly that. The Skins average time of possession this season is 32:54, the fourth best TOP in the league. Oh yeah, and they only have one turnover all season.

Did someone let a Born Again Christian into the Dallas Cowboys locker room yesterday? That's the only explanation I can think of for TO's about face, praising God and his infinite glory for his two catch, one TD game. This is a week after TO ripped QB Tony Romo for not throwing him the ball more.

As was recounted in the Shreveport Times:

"I just have been dealing with a lot of stuff and this was a great team win," Owens said in a brief postgame news conference. "I am more than No. 81. It's more about a star being on my helmet.

"I am standing here today to confess my faith in God and the ability he gave me to go out there and show that on this football field today.

"God used me today for his glory and that's all I have to say."

Maybe it's just a phase that will pass when the Cowboys move stadiums and God can't watch through that hole in the roof anymore.

Sage Rosenfels must feel like the biggest goat in the pasture today. That's after coughing up a sure-fire victory by his Houston Texans against the Indianapolis Colts. Rosenfels filled in admirably for sick starting QB Matt Schaub, giving the Texans a 27-10 lead with just over four minutes remaining. Then after the Colts scored seven more, and the Texans recovered an onside kick he fumbled. Twice. Both resulted in touchdowns for Indianapolis. Final Score: Colts - 31, Texans - 27.

***

On the diamond, the Phillies sent the Brewers home for the season, eliminating them in the division series after a 6-2 win in Game Four. Brewers pitcher Jeff Suppan was lit up like Times Square — allowing 5 earned runs, including 3 homers in three innings — to earn the loss.

The difference maker in this one? Ben Sheets. Sure, he didn't play in the series after being shut down with injuries (again), but had he still been healthy it's doubtful Suppan would have ever toed the rubber. It's a big difference between a top-two of CC Sabathia and Sheets (3.09 ERA this season) and Sabathia and a 50-percent Yovani Gallardo (only six appearances all year due to a torn ACL).

The Brew Crew should get used to it though, as it looks like Sheets is unlikely to return as he enters free agency this season attempting to become Carl Pavano 2.0, inking a big deal and missing the majority of the contract years due to injury.

The Brewers might not be done with Sabathia however, according to SI's Jon Heyman. He says the team will attempt to keep the most coveted pitcher on the free agent market. They'll face stiff competition from the Yankees, Mets, Giants and Dodgers who will all be offering Johan Santana-like cash ($137.5 million over six years).

The White Sox continued to carry the Windy City's postseason hopes, winning 5-3 over the Rays to force Game Four this afternoon. White Sox skipper Ozzie Guillen offered his sympathy to the North Siders in traditional Ozzie fashion, saying "F*ck the Cubs," before adding that Cubs manager Lou Piniella is one of his idols and that he called pitcher Carlos Zambrano to tell him to keep his head up. What a guy.

Break Out the Brooms

Remember all of those articles saying that this was definitely the season the Cubs ended their World Series drought of 100 years? Remember how Kosuke Fukudome was supposed to bring them that title? Remember how both of those stories were on the cover of Sports Illustrated?

But yeah, there's no such thing as a curse ...

For the second year in a row the Cubs flamed out in spectacular fashion in the first round of the playoffs, swept by the Dodgers in three games. Despite the great regular season pitching of Carlos Zambrano, Ryan Dempster and Rich Harden, it didn't translate into the postseason. The offense couldn't produce and the defense made uncharacteristic, but crucial, errors.

One thing Yankees fans already knew was how Alfonso Soriano struggles in the postseason. Soriano is a great natural athlete, but I don't think anyone would accuse him of being intellectual. He's a mistake hitter and, over the course of 162 games, those mistakes can accumulate to some gawdy stats. In the playoffs though, when you're facing teams' top pitchers who are dialed in on every hitters' weakness, those mistakes are fewer and farther between. The lasting image of this series in my mind will be Soriano chasing pitches in the dirt.

Hmm ... Soriano doesn't produce in the postseason and neither does Alex Rodriguez. Fitting that they were once traded for each other.

***

ESPN.com proclaimed today that No. 14 Ohio State's narrow win over No. 18 Wisconsin restores Ohio State's national title hopes. (The ESPN lead-in reads: "Terrelle Pryor's 11-yard TD run with 1:08 remaining gave Ohio State a 20-17 victory over Wisconsin. With his first road win, the freshman QB put the Buckeyes right back in the race.")

I respectfully disagree. Wisconsin lost to a woeful Michigan team. OSU narrowly beating Wisconsin — even with the Badgers overrated ranking — in my mind isn't going to put the Buckeyes ahead of an undefeated team from the Mountain West.

That conference is too strong to ignore this year and if BYU finishes undefeated, I think they will play the SEC winner in the title game. That's not based on any math, but there's a very real possibility that BYU could reach the Top 5 by the end of the year if not higher. You can't have a team ranked in the Top 5 and ignored by the BCS. If Ohio State sneaks ahead of an unbeaten BYU team, you can't possibly argue that the BCS isn't broken.

Playoffs?!?! Are You Kiddin' Me?

Looks like the Cubs' coronation has hit a few snags. The cursed Cubbies dropped the first two games of their divisional series to Joe Torre's Dodgers and now the faithful are sitting on pins and needles as the teams head to L.A. for Game Three.

What's interesting to me isn't necessarily that the Dodgers are easily handling the best team in the National League, rather it's the reaction by the fans. In Philadelphia, the fans have been going crazy since the first pitch. In Chicago, it was like they either viewed the first series as a formality or they're waiting for the other shoe to drop. It was through the latter lens that Mets fans watched the final week of the regular seasons. Needless to say, it didn't work out too well for them.

Next theme for the playoffs: Whatever happened to good pitching beating good hitting? Yeah, Cole Hamels and John Lester were great, but established aces Carlos Zambrano, C.C. Sabathia and John Lackey all tasted defeat after nearly immaculate regular season performances.

It's not like they're the only All-Stars to come up lame so far. Vlad Guerrero's baserunning blunder may have cost the Angels a big inning in Game One against the Red Sox. And Alfonso Soriano continues to abide by his unwritten contract that he must swing at every pitch in the dirt. In October, it's small things like that that stack up and bite you.

On the positive side of things, Evan Longoria of the Rays made his bid for Mr. October status with 2 HR in his first 2 AB in a 6-4 win over the White Sox and Manny Ramirez hit another HR last night, his second in the first two games against the Cubs. Speaking of Manny, if you have, oh, three days and four nights, a six-pack of energy drinks, take a look at Bill Simmons' Magnus Opus to Ramirez.

What do you think? Is this legit? Or does it just read like some love letter designed to defend a secret crush? (If you believe it's the former though, you have to explain to me what the first section has to do with anything.)

Can't Cheat Death

As the saying goes, you can't cheat death, something that Al Davis (top) — who sure looks like Death (bottom) — reinforced yesterday by firing Lane Kiffin. Davis claimed that Kiffin was damaging his team by disparaging the Raiders, and Davis, to the media.

Davis axed Kiffin, whom Davis had personally selected to fill the head coaching position, over the phone Tuesday morning. He also took it to the extreme by firing Kiffin "with cause," meaning that Davis will not pay Kiffin the remainder of his contract if the firing stands up in court.

Congratulations, Al. You just made your head coaching job really desirable. Not only are you so fickle that the new coach will never know when he's about to be canned, but he won't even be sure he'll be paid for his effort. Good work indeed. And you wonder why the Raiders are 20-64 since 2003 ...

***

Congratulations to the Chicago White Sox on winning the American League Central Division by beating the Twins, 1-0, in Game 163 of the 2008 season. The White Sox beat three different teams on three consecutive days in order to make the postseason — their season finale against Cleveland, a makeup game on Monday against the Tigers and Tuesday's play-in tiebreaker against the Twins.

The Sox must be pretty gassed heading into Thursday's division series opener against the Rays in Tampa, but don't bet against them. Remember the Rockies played about 176 innings against the Padres in a play-in game last season. All they did was make it to the World Series.

***

GM Brian Cashman was retained by the New York Yankees with a three-year deal yesterday, meaning he'll be the one to make the sweeping changes promised by Hank "The Bank" Steinbrenner last month.

Whatever moves the Yankees make, I hope they steer clear of injury-prone pitchers Ben Sheets and A.J. Burnett. In fact, someone ought to send Cashman a picture of Carl Pavano for his desk just to remind him. After signing Pavano in 2004, the pitcher was so consistently dinged up that the New York Post took to calling him "American Idle." Just having an opportunity to watch Pavano pitch in pinstripes was a rarity unto itself, with starts almost as scarce as Raider wins over that time. (Oh, burn!)

***

The Washington Capitals are close to finalizing their roster for the 2008-09 season as they try to defend their Southeast Division title. A few interesting notes from their training camp, where I spent this past weekend:

• The team returns Chris Clark and Michael Nylander this season after both missed significant time due to injury last year. Both looked smooth and strong on the ice during practice sessions and had a combined seven points in preseason games heading into Monday night's contest against New Jersey.

"They look good," Head Coach Bruce Boudreau said this weekend. "They're fabulously conditioned athletes anyway. It makes us more dangerous, that's for sure."

That's potentially a huge understatement. Nylander led the team with 26 assists and had 37 points in 40 games last season before missing the remainder of it with a shoulder injury. A year earlier he tallied 83 points playing for the New York Rangers.

Clark is just a year removed from a 30 goal season and, depending on how Boudreau crafts his lines will skate with either Nicklas Backstrom (55 assists in his rookie year in 2008), Nylander or Sergei Fedorov at center. He'll have some good chances to repeat that 30 goal feat this season.

• Defenseman John Carlson made a strong impression on the Caps this training camp before being sent down this past weekend. The 18-year old didn't have much of a shot at making this team, not when WHL MVP Karl Alzner might not even make the cut (... though I still think he will).

Moral of the story though? Ever since the rebuild began in 2004 the team made a commitment to draft high-caliber defensemen. Their reward is now tremendous depth at the blue line. It's not the equal of the defensive corps of the Red Wings, for example, at least not yet. But these young defensemen should only improve with age and if the team can retain the best of them: Mike Green, Shaone Morrisonn, Jeff Schultz, Alzner and Carlson among that crowd — the Caps corps projects to rival some of the league's top blue lines down the road.

• Chris Bourque, a former second-round pick by the Caps and the son of hockey legend Ray Bourque, is making it hard for Boudreau to send him back to Hershey for another season. With two goals and two assists heading into Monday's game against New Jersey, Bourque was tied for the team lead in preseason points.

It looks like it will come down to Bourque and Boudreau favorite Quintin Laing for that final roster spot. My guess is that if Boudreau thinks the third or fourth line needs more offensive firepower, Bourque will get the nod. If he needs more grit, Laing — who is never afraid to throw his body in front of a slap shot — will be the guy.

• During his days playing in hockey's minor leagues, the affable Boudreau spent some time as an extra in the cult-hit hockey film "Slap Shot," starring Paul Newman. On Sunday, a day after Newman's passing, I asked Boudreau if he had any memories from working with the now-departed actor.

"To me, it's just a sad thing because he was a great humanitarian," Boudreau said. "When we saw him in 'Slap Shot,' he was a superstar actor at the top of his game, but he treated everyone so cool. We did a screening one night with George Roy Hill, him, my roommate Dave Hanson and I tagged along with him because I had no friends. And he [Paul] turned around and said to me, "You know, I just did 'Judge Roy Bean' for the money, but this is going to be a great movie.'

"I don't know, that's one line, over 30 years ago, that I will never forget because it was from Paul Newman. So it's a sad day for the world."

Saturday Upsets Sink BCS Teams

I'm out of town doing some reporting this weekend and only sporadically get Internet access, so this will likely be the only post until I get back on Tuesday, but I'll have some good stuff when I return.

Saturday was defined by underdogs leaving their mark on the BCS landscape. For those that think the existing BCS system is about as dumb as a submarine with a screen door, Saturdays like yesterday are beautiful. This week, USC, Georgia, Florida, Wisconsin and Wake Forest all went down. That likely means that Oklahoma and LSU are likely the ones driving that screen-door submarine to the BCS Title game right now.

Of course, LSU will still have to survive its rugged schedule in the SEC. And edging Mississippi State at home by only 10 points on Saturday wasn't a very convincing statement that the Tigers can do it.

I am desperately hoping that by the end of the season all of the top SEC teams have two intra-conference losses, making it extremely difficult to put one of them into the title game over a one-loss or undefeated team from the Pac-Ten, Big Ten, Big 12, Big East or Mountain West. Of course, the BCS will have to because the SEC is hands down the best conference in the country.

If the SEC gets snubbed you can bet its teams will start to think about leaving the BCS. On the other hand, any undefeated team will have every right to be upset at being overlooked. That's going to be one heck of a headache for those that run the bowl system. It's also one that is easily solved by a bracket.

Chaos, don't you love it!

Homeland Security Threat Level: (Mustard) Yellow

Lives were saved and tragedy was averted in Philadelphia when law enforcement agents and the bomb squad safely detonated a trio of suspicious objects outside the Phillies' ballpark Wednesday night. Of course, it still was a tragedy for connoisseurs of delectable processed meat.

The three objects turned out to be duct-taped hot dogs left outside by the team's mascot, the Philly Phanatic, after filming a promotion in which he fired the dogs out of an air gun. While the crisis was averted, the Phanatic's addition to the terrorist watch list may make his airport "freedom search" a little more painful than usual.

Detroit Villain Millen Chillin', Fired From Hot Seat

The Motor City's masochistic and mystifying marriage with Lions GM Matt Millen finally came to an end when the under performing executive was fired Wednesday. Millen, who famously spent three consecutive high first round draft picks on wide receivers while the team's defense languished, maintained his position through a barrage of criticism and a 31-84 record. At one point, fans actually formed a protest march against him, parading outside the Lions' stadium.

In avoiding the axe for so long, Millen showed survival skills that "Man Vs. Wild" protagonist Bear Grylls (fittingly pictured doing his best lion impersonation) would be proud of, but his magic wore off and now he's circulating his resume. I don't think the list of suitors will be all that long.

***

The Red Sox clinched a playoff berth last night and celebrated like it was New Year's Eve. Nothing wrong with that, but Jonathan Papelbon continues to demonstrate that the elevator stops a few floors short of the penthouse when it comes to jubilant moments. Check it out as seen on Comcast Sportsnet New England.

What is it with this dude and celebrations? Oh well, at least it's not as embarrassing as the footage unearthed by teammate Dustin Pedroia.

Clemens Cues Up the Violins

Roger Clemens was apparently "heartbroken" about being left out of the festivities for the final home game at Yankee Stadium, according to a relative. Not only did the Rocket's invite get lost in the mail, he was left out of the video montage of the organization's greatest pitchers.

See kids, the lesson here is this: Don't use drugs, or you'll be left out of video montages.

The report, posted on SI.com, also includes this passage: "Clemens was sitting at home in hurricane-ravaged Texas, in front of a battery-operated television on his living room couch, when the team delivered a final crushing blow to its former star. Clutching wife Debbie's hand on one side and mother-in-law Jan Wild's on the other, Clemens tuned in to his final team's last home game hoping for some recognition for helping win two World Series titles, Wild said."

Kind of odd how on one hand it sounds like he's squatting in a shanty watching the proceedings. I didn't know battery-operated TV to tune could get cable though, since the game and pre-game ceremonies were on ESPN and ESPN2. Sounds like a pretty nifty setup.

A New Kind of Pinstripes & Shea's Swan Song

The NYPD arrested 18 people trying to take home the House the Ruth Built after its final game on Sunday. What the story doesn't mention is what exactly these people were caught with. I can't believe they were frisking every fan on their way out, so presumably these mementos were pretty large. What the heck were the trying to swipe, the bat at the main entrance?

If you'd like to read up on some of the Stadium's lesser-known history that was glossed over during Sunday's broadcast, check out Tom Verducci's article in Sports Illustrated this week. Well-written piece that points out just how important this place really was.

I attended the Mets-Cubs game last night at Shea. Unlike Yankee Stadium, the wrecking ball will be doing the world a favor when Shea comes down. Neon caricatures? A bobbing apple in a top hat? I mean, c'mon. Is this a ballpark or Wally World? (As a side note, Citi Field, the Mets' new home next season, looks spectacular from the outside.)

Of course, if the Mets choke again and don't make the playoffs then there are a bunch of fans that might burn it to the ground before it ever opens. That's looking more likely after the Mets were destroyed on Monday night.

I thought New York Yankees fans were tough. Not only were there about 10,000 empty seats last night, those that did attend turned on starting pitcher Jon Niese in the swing of a bat.

Enthusiastically applauded before the game, he was booed mercilessly as he left the mound after giving up a grand slam to Jason Marquis. Yeah, that's pitcher Jason Marquis. Okay, so maybe Niese deserved it. (Though Marquis did bat .310 in 2005.)

The Mets look bad right now. Real bad. Their bullpen is attrocious and their lineup is streaky, but their real problem seems to be confidence. It's like they're playing every game waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Note to Mets Fans: This is how Red Sox fans lived for 86-years. Enjoy.

The tank is filling up again, and it looks like another postseason is set to be flushed away in Flushing Meadows.

***

Is it okay to say that Brett Favre looks completely pedestrian so far? Can I say that the fourth-down float pass for a touchdown against Miami that was "sooooo Brett Favre" was more a product of luck and poor defense than the touch of a Hall of Fame QB? Favre is a legend. I get that. But let's not act like he's King Midas.

When Tom Brady was hurt, it was like someone annointed the Jets the new rulers of the AFC East. Guess they're actually going to have to earn it like everyone else. The Jets have a lot of work to do before they can consider themselves playoff contenders.

4 Killed, Blink-182 Member In Critical After Plane Crash

Four people were killed and former Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker and celebrity DJ AM were left in critical condition after their Learjet crashed in South Carolina. You can read the full report here.

The House that Ruth Built and the House that George Kill't

I'm not one of those people who wish the Yankees would never leave Yankee Stadium, but I am one who will be extraordinarily sad when it is torn down. The probability of man tears will be high that day.

While I wish the Yanks could continue playing in a modern ballpark where a trip to the men's room doesn't require a background in spelunking, I also wish the heritage of the old stadium could be preserved as is. And yes, I know how terribly impractical and expensive that would be. But isn't that what the Yankees specialize in these days?

This week's FCNP Picking Splinters takes a look at the final days of Yankee Stadium and why the team missing the postseason may be an unfit ending for the stadium's lifespan, but an entirely appropriate beginning to a new era marked exclusively by high prices - both for the seats and the players.

In the column I discuss the fate of the blue collar Yankee fan and how he/she is being marginalized by the process of moving to the new field. I'm sure the Yankees would counter by saying that there will be inexpensive seats available. In fact, I think I found some already.

This is a digital view of seats offered in the new stadium. Check out the sweet seats in the back part of Section 239, as reported on by New York Magazine. So, does this make the new stadium The House that Ruth Would Not Have Been Seen In From The Left Field Bleachers? Eh, whatever. It's not like anyone hits home runs to right field in Yankee stadium anyway ... Oh, wait a minute ...

Will I still be a Yankee fan after the move? Yes. Am I bitter that prices are rising exponentially? Yes. Is it a business? Yes. But all good businesses realize that pricing out your best customers -- in this case die-hard middle-class fans -- is a lousy strategy for long term economic success.

With New York's big businesses taking it on the chin, I wouldn't be at all surprised if there are some empty seats near the field if prices don't drop in a few years. The Nationals were impacted severely by campaign finance reform legislation that reduced the number of tickets bought by and for congressional offices. Something similar could happen in New York, though obviously New York is a much, much bigger market and even struggling firms still have deep pockets for discretionary spending.

Yost Is Toast; No More Action for Jackson ... (and for a time, Arenas)

I meant to post this the other day, but didn't have time. Sorry about the lack of posts. Sometimes actual work derails me and it's tough to get something coherent posted up here. I'll do better this weekend.

Biggest headline of the week thus far is the firing of Milwaukee Brewers Manager Ned Yost ... while his team was tied for the NL wild card lead. For those scoring at home, that makes it FireNedYost.com: 1 - Ned Yost: 0.

According to the Elias Sports Bureau, it's the latest any manager has been fired in a season and the first time he's actually been in position to make the postseason when it happened.

The Brewers had been struggling lately and watching their once-comfortable lead for the Wild Card disappear. Brewers brass clearly thought something needed to be done and this was their solution. The immediate reaction is definitely, "wow!" and that it's illogical given that they were on track to make the postseason when the axe dropped. But think about it this way: Say Yost, a prickly clubhouse personality, really had lost the team. Consider also that his moves are often questionable: Such as bringing in a left-handed pitching specialist from the bullpen to then intentionally walk the left-handed hitting Ryan Howard and pitch to the right-handed Pat Burrell in Milwaukee's recent series against Philadelphia.

If the team is struggling, a manager isn't particularly popular with the players and his coaching decisions are suspect, why keep him around? How much does that continuity actually help you if your team keeps losing? It didn't work for the Mets in 2007. They kept Willie Randolph, their collapse continued and they missed the playoffs, only to cut Willie early in 2008. When they get rid of him, they get a huge bounce and start playing like contenders again. So the question really becomes, "Why wait?"

Tough break for Yost, but perhaps not as strange a move as we all first thought.

***

At the start of the football season I noted that while the Vikings (and several pundits) thought they could win the NFC North this season and even compete for a Super Bowl, QB Tarvaris Jackson didn't have me convinced he could lead the offense.

Apparently I'm not the only one. Vikes' boss Brad Childress benched the QB yesterday in favor of the partially fossilized Gus Frerotte, thereby maintaining the continuity of superfluous r's under center.

While I always like to jab older QBs a little bit, it's the right move. The Vikings want to win now and Jackson is clearly not ready. I can't believe no one saw this from his work last season. How could they not have addressed this in the offseason? Or were they actually planning their season around having Brett Favre at QB? Hmm.

ESPN blogger Kevin Seifert thinks this benching jeopardizes Childress's reputation as a molder of quarterbacks. I think that assumes the decision was his in the first place. The guys at the top of the organization cannot be happy about dumping a ton of money into the team this offseason only to watch the team lose its first two games.

***

In news that's about as shocking as finding gambling in a casino, Washington Wizards guard Gilbert Arenas will miss time due to his knee injury. This after signing his $111 million contract in July.

For the record, I like Gilbert. How can you not as a writer? The guy is a character. He even has his own blog. And when he's healthy, he's a heck of a basketball player. But he's been a continual injury risk and now the team locked him in for over $100 mill. Does no one learn the lessons of Allan Houston? I hope things turn out alright for Gilbert, because he's much more fun on the court than off, but I'm still raising my eyebrows at the signing. With the NBA organized in such a way that the smallest roster gaffe can cost you a decade — see: Knicks, New York — this news could be what dooms the Wiz.

Big Ten Burial

Last night I slashed my wrists with a rusty fork ... Oh, wait ... no I didn't, I just watched "Saturday Night Live." Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference. I always admire that cast because when skits tank it's pretty hard to endure. I don't know if I'd be able to do that every week and make it funny. But I do know that after watching bland episodes like last night's, I have no desire to stay up (or stay in) and watch it for the rest of the season.

Sooooooo ... the Big Ten ... word is that the biggest obstacle to a playoff system is from Big Ten commish, Jim Delany. Is there any wonder why that obstacle exists after his top team from 2008, Ohio State, gets its pants beaten off by USC? Ever since Ohio State upset a Miami team pre-destined for the national championship in 2003, the Big Ten has held a place as the second-best football conference in the nation behind the SEC. Sometimes it may have been true, but we'll never know because they seldom get to prove that on the field before the bowl games. Big Ten's record in bowl games since 2003? 3-7. Time to rethink the Big Ten's status. Differ with that opinion? Then they're going to have to prove it to me on the field, because right now the Big Ten is the biggest reason I think the BCS is broken.

Secretly surprising ... No. 17 Penn State hasn't played anyone on their level yet this year, but they have totally trucked every other squad they've taken the field against. So far they've beaten Coastal Carolina (66-10), Oregon State (45-14) and Syracuse (55-13). Nice run thus far and they have some serious weapons.

They should next eradicate Temple. The Illinois defense, which couldn't even slow a similar offensive scheme from Missouri shouldn't pose a challenge either. Bold prediction: If Penn State tops Ohio State, date, they'll play in a BCS game ... BUT it will not be for the BCS championship. Ohio State stained the Big Ten's rep too bad by getting smacked in Southern Cal last night. Without a non-conference foe against whom the Lions can prove their worth, they'll spend the early new year lamenting a lost opportunity to play for the national championship. Maybe Joe Pa should have added some substance to that slate of non-conference cupcakes.

Last night ESPN.com exclaimed "Maryland's Relentless Defense Stifles No. 23 Cal."

Interesting headline, considering that "relentless" defense sure seemed to relent when it allowed 21 points in the fourth quarter. Look, it's a good win for Maryland, but let's not blow it out of proportion. The Terps, who lost to Middle Tennessee, and nearly lost to D-IAA Delaware week one, almost allowed a likely jet-lagged team from the west coast to come back on them. Forget Cal's ranking, because we all know how accurate early season rankings are ... cough, cough, Michigan 2007, cough ... this helps the ACC's abysmal track record, but it doesn't eliminate the whole conference from critcism. Cal hasn't beaten a halfway decent non-conference team on the road since 2003 when the Bears beat Illinois 34-31.

British Baseball

Outsiders are attempting to plunder the origins of our national pasttime. British historians have apparently uncovered a diary entry from 1755 that uses the term baseball to describe a game played by British lawyer William Bray and some of his friends. The entry reads:

"Went to Stoke Ch. This morning. After Dinner Went to Miss Jeale's to play at Base Ball with her, the 3 Miss Whiteheads, Miss Billinghurst, Miss Molly Flutter, Mr. Chandler, Mr. Ford & H. Parsons & Jelly. Drank Tea and stayed till 8."

Observation No. 1: Women were playing baseball. Observation No. 2: Who the hell is this Jelly dude, and who did he have to piss off to be known as "Jelly" when everyone else gets a proper salutation of Mr. or Miss before their name? Observation No. 3: There is nothing in the entry that absolutely describes the game "Base Ball" in here, thereby offering no real proof that baseball was first played in England.

Maybe Base Ball was Bray's secret nickname for his attempts to "round the bases" with one of the many Misses on the list. Or maybe with Jelly ...

TV and Tunes

Just got around to watching the premiere of HBO's "True Blood," a new series by Alan Ball, creator of "Six Feet Under." The show is based on an alternative reality (we hope) where vampires have come "out of the coffin" and live openly among humans, feeding themselves on a synthetic blood substitute instead of us ... which is nice of them.

It's a really interesting premise and provides a revolutionary way to discuss preconceptions, prejudices, stereotypes and humanity's dark and light side. Anna Paquin stars as your run of the mill beautiful Louisiana waitress who leads an apparently unexciting life and also has the ability to read minds. (What, you can't?)

Everything's boring and peaceful until she meets her first vampire (Peter Moyer) and her brother accidentally kills a woman after watching Vam-porn. I think I read about that in the New York Post yesterday. Anyway, the show is thoughtful and exciting and I'll definitely be tuned in for the rest of the series.

I'm not sure how I feel about Paquin (and in turn the audience) being able to hear every character's thoughts. On one hand, it's a creative way to explore human prejudices and exposes an otherwise unavailable dimension to some of these characters. On the other hand, now there are no secrets and we will always know what's up someone's sleeve. I guess I'm okay with it, so long as they stay consistent and Paquin always behaves like she knows peoples' thoughts and it doesn't just crop up when it's convenient to the writers.

***

Speaking of spooky debuts ... J.J. Abrams' new show "Fringe" aired Tuesday and only nine million or so people tuned it. Ouch. Those are not good numbers for a prime time show on a big network. The Wash Post's Lisa de Moraes takes an amusing look at it here.

The show itself is entertaining, but I didn't get the same feeling of immediate addiction like I did with "Lost" or "House." I like the premise, but the execution seemed a little lacking. The dialogue felt a little thin, the cool fringe-science procedures were glossed over without any detail and I hated the relationship between lead Anna Torv and her FBI partner. I'm also getting a little tired of the immense conspiracies with bottomless pits of money and resources to battle our intrepid heroes.

To its credit, it held my interest for an hour-thirty, but I'm wondering if it will hold me through the season finale. Of course, if more people don't start watching, the latter challenge may become considerably easier.

***

Picked up the new Joshua Radin album today. A friend of mine introduced me to his music a few years ago and I later profiled him for "Press Pass." I like his sound, but after 10 tracks of near-whispered vocals and softly strummed chords, I was hoping for more variety on his second album. Fortunately he delivered. Radin turns up the volume of his vocals on this release, Simple Times, and mixes in some poppier arrangements to his coffee-shop singer-songwriter routine. Definitely worth picking up.

A Lambeau-tiful Monday Night

Aaron Rodgers assumed the mantle of Green Bay quarterback last night, ending most doubts about his abilities and the purge of Brett Favre with a 24-19 win over Minnesota on Monday night. I'm very happy for Rodgers, whom the crowd supported throughout the game. Minnesota's defense is among the league's best, but Rodgers handled the Vikings in stride. I wish I could say this puts an end to the "did the Packers make the right move?" question, but I'm certain it will crop up again when Rodgers has his first bad game. There are too many media types in the tank for Favre for it not too.

***

Knees seem to be the big losers so far this NFL season: Tom Brady, Osi Umenyiora and Nate Burleson are all out for the season with knee injuries. Shawn Merriman should be out for the season, but he's too bent on winning a Super Bowl to realize his knee needs massive surgery.

Others fitting squarely in the "loser" category this weekend: The Bengals — Maybe they should have worried more about their offensive scheme than whether or not they should let an underperforming, injured wide receiver change the name on his uniform to "Ocho Cinco."

The Rams — That rebuilt pass rush didn't seem to trouble Eagles QB Donovan McNabb too much in the Eagles 38-3 smackdown.

The Lions — If you lose to the Falcons this season, who are you supposed to beat?

Pac-10 officials — The rule says you can't throw the ball "high in the air" in celebration and the Washington QB did so. It's a dumb rule. He threw the ball in the air. He didn't breakdance in the end zone and pretend to moon the opposition. Alas, a rule is a rule ... and it cost the Huskies the game against BYU after their PAT was blocked because it was 15-yards further away.

The Yankees — Say goodnight. Wish I could say they gave the playoffs a good run. But they didn't. Injuries didn't help, but the lineup is too good to be this bad.

The Rays — Those footsteps they're hearing from behind? They're going to feel them any minute now. Especially after dropping four in a row and six of their last 10.

Notre Dame — Yeah. I know they won. Over San Diego State. By only eight points. Over San Diego State. For those who don't know, San Diego State gave up 483 yards of total offense in a season-opening loss to Cal Poly ... a D-IAA school. Touchdown Jesus may want to close his eyes for the next few home games in the Irish can't get themselves straightened out.

And because I don't like ending on sour notes ... a few winners as well.

Donovan McNabb — He still doesn't have a No. 1 receiver. In fact his top two are hurt right now. All he does is dice up the Rams. Sorry, Rush, this guy's pretty good.

East Carolina — Virginia Tech? Beaten. West Virginia? Beaten. Chances that UVA will prevent the Purple Pirates from gaining the Virginia trifecta? Zero.

Brady's BooBoo

Trent Dilfer reported on ESPN News tonight that Tom Brady will be out for the remainder of the year following a knee injury suffered in the Patriots' season opener today. Most other news outlets, including ESPN.com, are mum on his season status for now, but Dilfer broke the story (or the inaccuracy) after speaking on the phone with an anonymous Pats player who told him that Matt Cassel would be New England's quarterback for the remainder of the season.

Tough blow for the Pats if this proves true. It's bad luck for Brady, but it's hard to feel too bad for a guy who will now spend the season being nursed back to health by the most attractive bedside attendant ever -- Gisele Bundchen (shown here). Conventional wisdom says that New England's Super Bowl aspirations are blown with Brady's knee, but Brady himself was an in-season replacement himself ... and all he did was win three rings.

Of course there's still the chance that the report could be erroneous. In two ways actually. Yes, Brady could be healthy and return, though my gut tells me he's done. His injury looked very similar to the same blow that made Bengals QB Carson Palmer miss a year of his career. But there's also the possibility that Cassel will not be the QB for the rest of the season. With that in mind, let me be the first (that I know of) to float this baseless, but logical, rumor. Paging Daunte Culpepper.

Yeah, Culpepper stepped away and "retired" from the game a few days ago, whining all the way home that no one gave him a "fair" opportunity to land a job. But, Culpepper is the only quarterback who has clicked with Randy Moss as well as Tom Brady did last season. He's available, he's experienced and he is dying for a chance to prove himself on a big stage. (He repeatedly turned down offers to be a back up this summer). It could be a match. It could be nothing Bill Belichick would ever consider. At the very least, it's good fodder for water cooler discussion.

More breakdown on Sunday's games and more tomorrow.

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday

It's the first Sunday of pro football in the 2008 season and I'll be working. Sigh. Good thing I have a TV on my desk these days.

I'll be back tonight with some more substantial updates. In the meantime, check out this week's Splinters in the FCNP and Press Pass with Matthew Ryan, one of my favorite songwriters.

And for those in the District, check out Dr. Z's assessment of Jim Zorn's debut as Head Coach. Pretty spot on in my view.

NFL Kickoff, More from the Bungles and NBA Acclimation

The NFL season is underway, the Giants are in the win column and the Redskins still look lost on offense. Plaxico Burress celebrated his new contract by pulling in 10 catches for 130+ yards and Brandon Jacobs rushed for 116 as the Giants rode the Redskins' inept offense to the win.

The game may best be summed up by this clip here when Jacobs introduces LaRon Landry (whom Redskins fans worship for his physical play) to his shoulder.

It wasn't a great game from the Giants. They left a lot of points on the board and Eli wasn't as sharp as he can be, but it's a W against a division foe so I don't think they'll complain too much. The blips that turned three drives from touchdowns to field goals looked to be the sort that will work themselves out over time — false starts, missed assignments, passes falling a step away from receivers. The Redskins on the other hand looked stagnant all night long. The Giants got pressure on QB Jason Campbell early and only allowed Clinton Portis one big run. And when the Redskins had a chance to come back in the fourth quarter (albeit a slim one) they sapped the clock and seldom threw the ball downfield.

A lot of the early season attention has been on Campbell's development at quarterback (despite picking up a different playbook about every year for the last four), but maybe Jim Zorn's development as a head coach should be up there as well. The play calling didn't seem to jive with the Skins' strengths. They threw at Chris Cooley twice, with one of those passes called back for a penalty. They ran the ball, but only to try to set up a pass by Campbell. I get the feeling this is going to be a long year in the District.

***

David Stern is smoked that former Kansas stars Mario Chalmers and Darrell Arthur were found with women and marijuana in their room during NBA rookie orientation. Weed, women, sounds like Chalmers and Arthur are adapting to their new surroundings just fine. What will they get for their advanced acclimation? Possible suspensions to start the season.

***

The Bengals spent the early part of the offseason refusing to trade Chad Johnson and swearing they were not going to bow to player demands. Then they allow Chad Johnson to wear a jersey featuring the title of his alter ego "Ocho Cinco." Way to hold the line there Bengals.

Italian Trash Talkin'

New mantra for Italian soccer: Sticks and stones (and headbutts from French midfielders) will break our bones, but words will never hurt us ... unless we're Neopolitan soccer fans.

Maybe the folks at UVA knew what they were doing when they banned signs from their sporting events. Italian soccer team Inter Milan was ordered to pay 1,500 euros to a fan who suffered "existential damage" from signs debasing Napoli for its well-documented trash problem. Among the signs: “Ciao cholera sufferers!” and “Neapolitans have tuberculosis.” Zing.

If thin skin can grab some cash for those weak insults, can you imagine the kind of paper schools would have to cough up for signs like the one shown here?

More to come from the NFL opener and the rest of the sporting world tomorrow.